As The Butter Churns

April 26th To Bee Or Not To Bee

   (Saying another good-bye at Burbank Airport)

(Henry and Awesomez bid farewell)

    While we were at the airport waiting for our flight Henry suddenly remembered he had a cap gun in his suitcase. Thankfully, this thought came to his brain in the restaurant while we were killing time before our flight with Awesomez.

    “Are you kidding me?” I asked. “You have a gun in your suitcase? What were you thinking?”

    “Well, I thought it would be fun to keep it after playing with Parker, but last time we checked my bag so I didn’t think it was a big deal. I forgot you brought the extra suitcase inside yours for the hand-me-downs from Awesomez.”
I didn’t know what the heck to do with it so we left it on the table. As we walked out our server chased us out.

    “Uhhh you left something on the table!” She said wild-eyed.

    “It’s trash. Just throw it away.” Awesomez calmly replied with a wave of her hand.

    “Let me get this straight. She was going to give us the gun back? What if we were terrorists? Oh here, you forgot your weapon” I said sarcastically.

    As we were saying good-bye to Awesomez with hugs, tears and promises to visit I could see a group of servers gathering at the entrance to the restaurant eyeing us. I felt nervous. Guilty of a federal crime. It was time to board the plane and we still had to go through security, I didn’t need to be pulled aside and questioned.

    “The way they’re looking us you’d think we had a bomb.” Oh my God! I didn’t just say BOMB in an airport in Los Angeles? Had I lost my mind? “We’d better go before they decide we need to be detained.” And with one last hug, off we went.

    Of course, when you’re in a hurry everything goes wrong. Henry accidently left a tube of toothpaste in his bag.  His bag was searched.

    “Henry!”

    “I thought I was checking my bag!” He said desperately.

    “Do you want us to have this put in your checked luggage?” the woman asked.

    “No. I prefer you throw it out and we make our plane. I’d hate to miss it over a tube of citrus toothpaste he barely uses anyway.” I glared at the criminal putting his tennis shoes on.

    As we trotted through the airport toward the gate we heard our names called for final boarding. We went into a dead run, business cards flying out of my camera bag.

    “Should I get those?” Henry called.

    “NOOOOOO just keep moving.” 

    Everyone clapped and smiled as we boarded the plane and took our seats. Each of them glad they weren’t us disheveled, breathing hard, gripping our carry-on.

    Once seated, Henry and I promptly closed our eyes.  With only ten hours of sleep in the last few days I thought I would go right out, but my mind was racing. I was anxious to get back to the farm and start back on the fence. My mind buzzed with ideas about what needed to get done. I could no longer avoid the paper disaster in Mike’s old room with guests coming this summer. I would need two guest rooms. I could procrastinate no longer.

    Eventually, Henry woke up and we both needed to go to the restroom which meant we’d have to wake up the guy in the aisle seat. Henry gently nudged him apologizing. Henry being a boy, and all that that implies, was already back in his seat entrenched in conversation when I arrived.

    “Mama? Do you have a business card? I need one.” Henry asked matter-of-factly.

    “What?”

    “He’s a bee farmer?” Henry informed me. “Did you know bees are disappearing exponentially? And that if bees disappear man won’t be far behind because there will be no bees to pollinate the food?” Mama, this is Dan. Dan this is my mother.”

(Henry and Dan)

    “I’m Denise,” I said shaking his hand.
We talked about farming, and laughed about work coveralls versus going to town coveralls. How distant most of society was from an agrarian lifestyle in less than a hundred years and we talked about the severity of the bee situation. This led to a lengthy discussion between Dan and Henry.

    “So you get how many pounds of honey from one hive?” Henry asked thoughtfully.

    “About seventy.” Dan replied

    “And you sell that at $6.00 a pound?”

    “Right.”

    “What are your costs?” Henry inquired and kept inquiring about combs, wax and bee rentals to farmers. “So they pay you to bring your hive to their fields and you get to keep the honey?”

    “Right.” Dan responded.

    “Mama, I think you need to get some bees.” Henry said seriously. “It would help the Earth and you could make some money.”

    I’d been listening silently as my little entrepreneur asked some surprisingly insightful questions, and had already come to the same conclusion. I was excited about the bees. The idea of them had brought me renewed hope. Maybe the bees would be our “applesauce” like in “Babyboom”. Colonists certainly needed bees, heck otherwise they wouldn’t have had mead to drink or honey to sweeten things. George Washington and every other farmer knew how important the bee was to life. I’d been interested in bees for a while, but hadn’t been ready to dive in not knowing much about them, but after talking to Dan I was convinced we could do it.

     “Actually, I think it sounds like this should be your business Honey.”

    “Mama Really?”

    “Well, you’re birthday’s coming up. I’ll talk to your dad. It isn’t that big an investment, a hundred dollars or so and maybe he can charge it.”

    “Frankly, I think this guy could sell a ketchup pop sicle to a girl in a white dress.” Dan remarked.

    “Hey, you know that hot dog is lookin’ mighty dry.” Henry volleyed getting the appropriate laughter from the surrounding passengers.
(Dan teaching us about the plight of the bee and how to care for them)

    “Give Cedar Glen Bee Farm a call in Stanwood. The bees should be there by Wednesday, they’re bringing them up this week. Otherwise, you’ll miss the Spring and have to wait for next year.”
As we deplaned in Seattle and said good-bye Henry turned to me. “Mama, I’ve got the name.”

    “What is it?”

    “Henry’s Sweet Ass Honey.” He smiled proudly. “I think the label should have Miracle in a bee suit. I’m going to talk to the Acme General store and see if they’ll carry it.”

    “Sweet.” I said with a smile.

     “Mommmmm.” He laughed.

April 25th A Barbie Girl Living In A Barbie World

   

(Showbiz a floribunda)

    When you’re broke, and I mean really broke not struggling, not conserving, not tightening your belt, but afraid your debit card will get rejected broke, it dominates your every purchase, your every thought. And if you’re not, you can’t put yourself in that place. With this in mind and starving, I suggested we all go out to a breakfast joint. Breakfast is the cheapest meal of the day; you can get a bowl of oatmeal for about $ 4.00 and be full for hours. That was my plan, so off we headed to breakfast and on the way ended up at BJ’s Brewery for lunch. I didn’t want to be disagreeable so I taciturnly nodded benign agreement. I scanned the menu for the most affordable item. Minestrone soup. I tried not to pout, but as I watched them eat salads and sandwiches and order beers I couldn’t help it. I was hungry and this was not filling me up.

    The other thing I wanted to do with my money was go and get a cheap pedicure. Washington does not have pedicure deals like the Valley and instead of a trip to Cancun or the Bahamas, a facial or an expensive lunch I wanted a pedicure – to relax, a treat to make me feel pampered and a celebration of the day. While I was on the phone checking on Henry while my friends bought me a bottle of nail polish remover to help me save money. It was very kind and I knew they were right, I shouldn’t squander my cash on treats but I was disappointed. The day was not going according to plan.

    We moved on to Nordstrom Rack where we looked and shopped and browsed. I tried on cheap jewelry and found a necklace I might want but figured it didn’t go with my coveralls so I decided not to spend my pennies. However, when we got back to the hotel I found Laura had purchased the necklace for “herself” and for me to borrow. She’s clever for a blonde.

    From shopping Awesomez and I had to go run errands, pick up balloons, take Henry here and there and get ready for the reunion. With all this activity I barely got my toes painted when we got back and couldn’t take a shower because my polish hadn’t dried. To add insult to injury I discovered I had forgotten my make-up bag. Not my lotions and potions, but the basic necessities eyebrow pencil, eyeliner, shadow etc. Great. I had to borrow. Needless to say this put me in a foul mood. I was ready to stay home and forget the whole damn reunion.

    “Really. Really? You’re going to let this ruin your evening?” Awesomez asked incredulously. She doesn’t wear make-up. She says it makes her look like a clown. She didn’t understand.

    “Really.” I said with belligerent defiance. I knew we were close enough for me to yell at her and she wouldn’t flinch. Oh she wouldn’t like it, she’d be sad but she would still love me in the morning. A knock at the door saved her from my complete I-don’t-have-my-eyebrow-pencil-meltdown. Bar-back Barbie, June, walked in with bags of wine laughing and smiling dressed in a cool blue-grey blouse that set off her eyes. Without bothering with hellos after so many years I asked. “June, I’m in a crisis. This top? Or this top?” I pointed to the orange one Laura had given me in January.

(Spooneta Mondetta looking stunning)

    “Hmm I’m intrigued by the orange one. Put it on” It was like so many years ago as roommates she hadn’t missed a beat. “No. The black one is slimming.”

    “These shoes? Or the others?”

    “Those they look good with your toes.” She said with authority. I was beginning to breathe.

    “Belt? Or necklace?” I said with desperation.

    “Definitely the belt. Focal point. I like the cool way you tuck the blouse.” She said pouring the wine and handing me a glass.

    Despite June’s spot on assistance, I was still in the tail end of a snit as we parked; Awesomez turned to me and said before we walked through the doors “I hope you’re going to be able to enjoy the evening.”

    “I’m a party girl and this is a party. I will pull it together. I’m not going to get another chance to see all these people.” And I did. I laughed and talked and talked and laughed. What I talked about I have barely any idea. I hugged and remembered and took pictures in between margaritas. It was an amazing time full of memories and plans for the future. While I was there I booked visitors in June, July and August and I’m crossing my fingers they all show. After the party about thirty people came back to our room for margaritas and bottles of wine. Chicken wings showed up from somewhere and Awesomez’ oatmeal raisin cookies were violated.
(back- Nancy, Julie, Alisa, Dayna, Lisa #2, front- Me, Lori and Lisa #3- together we are the Alpha Gammas-)
(Laura and Lisa#4)

(June and Deb "Stearn")

(Susan and Lisa #5)
(Awesomez -Lisa #1-with the boys- Pat, Jeff and Gary)

(Lisa #5 enjoying the evening- comfortable with the paparazi at this point)
(Laura and Barbara Jordan)

    The next morning, a day with out obligations or chores I woke up to Awesomez who’d been transformed into “Crack-of-flipping-Dawn Barbie and a room that smelled like a fast food restaurant. We hit the ground running. A shower and our daily hike out to move the car before we got a ticket on a side street off Canoga. Then we piled in the car with June to shuttle Henry to his next destination and on to my long-awaited cheap breakfast!
(Henry and his new friend Salsa - he says she's spicy)

    “Henry this is June my old roommate.” I said introducing Henry through the car window.

    “Hey June! Hey Awesomez!” he said before getting in. Climbing in the car and slamming the door Henry paused for a moment. “You know there’s just way too much estrogen in the air.” I didn’t even know he knew the word estrogen. We were going to have to talk. I looked at him laughing and full of joy. He’d been having a great time and I was thrilled. My friend, Susan Iverson, said he had achieved “Rock Star Status” and I was happy for him, but my heart also ached knowing he didn’t have this kind of friendship at home. Why had I taken him from all of this? Did I do the right thing for him? Had I been selfish? I’d thought I was doing it for the family but perhaps I’d rationalized. Well, I’d have to think about that tomorrow. We drove past our old house and although I wanted to get out and start knocking on my old neighbor’s doors I knew I couldn’t with a car full of hungry women.

(death by snuggling - the kid tries to kill me)
(our old house)

    After listening to the conversation Henry said before he got out of the car, “I think I should be Metro Barbie” and he hugged June and Awesomez good-bye. We really were going to have to talk. I got out of the car and deposited Henry. He was happy and all seemed to be going my way. Until I got back in the car and found Awesomez had answered my phone. She’d told some Barbies that we’d meet them back at the hotel to eat. The hotel! I didn’t want to pay those prices. I snapped. Snapped. Seriously throwing a tantrum. I just wanted a nice economical time full of fun and laughter. Somehow though I just came off as a control freak. No one understood that going back to the hotel was going to be too expensive. It’s like telling a poor person to shop at Costco. Sure you get more for your money, but if you don’t have the money to buy seventy-five rolls of paper towels it does you no good. I started yelling at Awesomez the kind of yelling you reserve for family. The kind of yelling you only do when you know that your bad behavior will be in time forgiven and forgotten although there is a chance it will be held over your head, but you’re so upset you don’t care. I was hungry and I didn’t want to spend a lot of money – again.

    “But I already told them we’d go.” Awesomez said innocently having no idea how to tame the wild beast I was becoming. She’s sweet and soft spoken and she was totally out of her element. “I want you to be happy,” she said desperately. “What did I do? I just want everyone to get along.” She knew I was broke and I knew she knew I was broke, but as I said when you have more than five dollars in your pocket you just don’t understand how it feels to count each cent. Probably because she believed she'd pay for me, she assumed it, she wanted to take care of me. "You can't take it with you" she'd say quoting her father, but I couldn't make that assumption. I couldn't rely on her kindness and leech off her. She's my friend not a lottery ticket.

    Heroically, June slipped into Human Resources Barbie and drove back to the hotel. She calmly and cordially invited all those seated at the table to join us at Cables on Ventura Blvd for breakfast. And off we went.

    June ordered enough food to feed a village. She then decided she herself wasn’t a village, but tall enough to be described as a peninsula. “I just made that up.” She said and every one laughed as though they were drunk at 10:00AM. “I like to put together amazing bites of food.” She explained skewering a piece of turkey sausage.

    My sister who had joined us said “Well it looks like you’ve put together a breakfast shish kabob.” And it did, she had egg, waffle, meat and lord knows what else on that fork every time. It was an interesting technique. In fact, I’d eyed her last bit of pancake hungrily and was just about to stab it without permission when she suddenly without warning lopped it on top of a tomato. Weight Watchers would be happy I didn’t need the calories. With the financial hysteria behind me, the breakfast was a just another sidesplitting, eye-wiping laugh fest. Awesomez pulled the big sister card and paid my bill.

    When we got back to the hotel, we ran into Cindy who said she was sorry she’d missed us for breakfast. She said they knew I was a bit tight for funds and somehow had been given a free breakfast buffet ticket and had saved it for me. My heart filled, these were my friends.

    The day just went from one activity to another. No sooner did we get back to the hotel and sit down look at the clock and realize we had to leave again. It was almost time for the second game in the CSUN Softball double header and my little sister Barbara Jordan is the head coach. So off we went to Northridge tired and a little bleary-eyed. I was excited we were going to watch Barb. In college rain or shine I’d go to all her practices and all her home games and many of her away games including driving up to San Luis Obispo. I’d admired the work and dedication of the whole team and though they were reluctant they finally let me put make-up on almost of all of them even Mishy McAnany – third base gave in.

    Awesomez and I strode up to the ticket booth and I insisted on paying for her ticket. I know it was a small gesture, but that’s all I have right now. She graciously thanked me as if I was the one who had paid her plane ticket, hotel bill and breakfast. We sat down in the same stands I’d sat in twenty-five years ago and watched Barb walk her familiar Barbara walk out to the mound. I yelled “C’mon Barb” in my same squeaky high-pitched voice just as I used to. She turned and smiled at me over her shoulder. I was so proud of her, so confident and in charge. I chatted in the stands with her sister, Karen, "Remember when Barb used to steel all the bases Denise?" and I did. The girl had wheels. Karen had been instrumental in my choice of Catholicism. “Follow your heart and trust in God and all good things will come. He knows what you need,” she said encouraging me and reminding me of my faith. I soaked in the warm sunshine and released my problems. I couldn’t think of another afternoon I’d spent at a ball field watching anyone other than my son play in twenty-five years. It was glorious.  Especially when I saw how my little sister orchestrated the win using her old stand by to advance the run. - They didn't call her Bunt Jordan for nothing.

(Barb earning her keep)
(Barb waving dutifully)

(Awesomez and Spiritual Barbie - Karen an AOII and - Barb's sister)
(Barb # 18 Jordan and her Coach Torgeson whom she recently inducted into the Hall of Fame- he says she's next)

    Afterward, it was on to the 50th Anniversary reunion of CSUN. Tom was joining us there so Awesomez and I walked over traveling through time. She tripped me as we went and I felt seventeen again. The actual reunion was a snore. The tents were disorganized, they ran out of food and there was no actual place for us to gather. So a bunch of us including my sister, Barbara, Awesomez, Cindy, Laura, Tom and our old roommate who never pledged a sorority, Delinah went to dinner at California Pizza Kitchen. It was more eating, more drinking and more laughing. We talked about inspiring kids to like history and good historical fiction. I found out Delinah had dated my eighth grade crush and she promised to come up to the farm to visit.
(Pea and me)

(Barbara, me, the Matador and Pea)

(Laura sticking her tongue out at me - with Rick Simmons - sigma chi)

    It was getting late and Tom needed to get home so Delinah said she’d drive us back to our car still parked near the softball field. We all piled in to hers, which meant Laura had to sit in the child booster seat in the back. Laughing hysterically throwing out ridiculous things like Booster Seat Barbie as we sat under a lamp post in the Northridge Mall parking lot all because of a child’s booster seat and Cheerios™ simply enjoying being together. Delinah, who is now a professor of psychology, was laughing so hard she was doubled over the steering wheel, said thoughtfully as she started the car, “After twenty-five years I finally get why you pledge a sorority. I finally finally get it, too bad.”  Funny, at that moment I felt pretty rich.

April 23rd Trail of Tears

   

  (Oatmeal Rasin cookies in the making)

     In the morning, Tom and I got up chatted about different possibilities for the future. We snuck over to the trailer and looked at how big our boy was. Our eyes misty at how fast the time is going. We sat around drinking coffee discussing pigs, fences and how to pay the mortgage. We made coffee for us and Oatmeal Raisin cookies for L. Awesomez. Henry’d wanted to surprise her with something of his own so we’d had a key chain engraved with “Lord Awesomez” on one side and “Henry” on the other.
(Henry nestled in his teardrop)

    We sent Tom off to work and Henry I headed into town with Tom’s Civic Hybrid. Our first order of business was getting me glammed up. I’d called ahead and gotten an appointment with my old hairdresser Michele in Westlake Village, we’d met years before through Maryellen Pepperdine a second grade teacher at my school, her grandfather started the university. Any way I arrived ready for my deep condition and cut. Everything was as it should be the water hot and steamy, the scalp massage deep and relaxing except for the emptiness in this once busy salon. The hard reality of the economy became even more real as Michele relayed horror stories about hard working people, clients, hairdressers people I knew who were going to lose everything. They’d cashed in their 401Ks to try and save their homes and at the same time trying to figure out how to send their kids to college. These people with bad backs and sore knees were now unable to make payments because of layoffs. Michelle told me people were still coming in for appointments because they’d have to look presentable for job interviews, but instead of going six weeks between a color or cut they’d go eight. A tough loss for the hardworking hairdresser putting in twelve-hour days.

(Henry and Michele)

    Many of my friends including Pea have said that it was bad out in the job market and that I was not alone and although I believed them and knew what I’d heard and seen was true, it was always difficult to hear it from someone earning a paycheck. Listening to Michele brought tears to both of us. I guess my life didn’t look as bleak when I walked out. I had green trees and beautiful surroundings; I started to count my blessings. I can have a lot of fun going nowhere vacationing in my backyard but I worried about my friend and her friends and their families.

    For me, Southern California and it’s excess called to mind the grand old antebellum South. Like the South, California it’s McMansions, Mercedes, off the menu lunches and waste are a civilization and a way of life that seem to be crumbling. Perhaps for the best, I’ve already heard of many positive unexpected side effects taking place. People are starting to appreciate what they have and take only what they need. They’re beginning to see the worth of the intrinsic and intangible. Relationships and time are beginning to mean more than possessions. But change is never easy and it is those like the Scarlets who can reinvent themselves in this new economy who will prosper in the end.

    Henry and I got in the car and drove to our next stop quiet and contemplative. I wanted to take Henry to visit my mother’s grave. My mother always said she didn’t care what the heck we did with her body “I won’t be there, but if you want a place to visit well you can.” She’d said many times.

    As we drove up I could see the spot where Lisa and I negotiated the plot. Henry and I drove past the Garden of Innocence where tiny babies lay and found my mother’s stone. There was an older gentleman nearby kneeling on a small red towel reading a bible, but upon our arrival he put the Bible in a plastic bag left it in front of the grave and discreetly moved away generously giving us our privacy. Henry crawled around the stone Tom designed with inscription Lisa and I had put together.

(Henry by the grave)

(My mother's signature and her smiley face - "Our little mommy, we love her so"- around the border are all the listed all the things she loved---margaritas strappy shoes manicures traveling tulips curly hair laughing bridge chatting friends movies red wine jenga ping pong non-fat lattes bracelets llamas sushi fuzzy socks roses german pancakes chocolate quinn henry cuddling spiders marlon brando astrology gardening bubble baths jacks blue jays bicycles walking hats eyelashes pink nail polish phone calls every single animal and teaching)

(My mother's self-portrait which donned every note, lunch bag and present I ever received)

    “Quinn and I are on here, but not Phoebe.” Henry said concerned.

    “She wasn’t born yet honey.” I said. Tears blurred my vision as I sat holding my son missing my mother. Tom’s words “It doesn’t get easier you just get used to it” echoed in my head again. He’d spoken them ten years ago on the night she died he’d spoken the absolute truth.

    “I wish I’d known her Mama really known her. I wish I could have picked her up and swung her around like she’d wanted.” Henry said with a soothing tone and maturity I was unfamiliar with.

    “She’d have only had to live until you were about four-years-old Bam-Bam,” I said with a smile in my voice. I didn’t want to overburden him with my grief. “I’m just sorry the stone has cracked. I don’t’ have the money to fix it now, but I don’t think my mother will mind.”

    “I think it’s kind of good we have to do it over.”

    “Why?”

    “Cause now we can add Phoebe. I think we should add Pheebs.”

    “I like the way you think.” I said getting myself together. We went to the car and got found some paper towel and Windex™ ever-prepared-Pea kept in the trunk and cleaned off the grave. I’d wished we’d brought tulips, but my mother would have thought that money ill spent at this time.

    We got in the car and changed gears. The sun was shining and we were on our way to the Burbank Airport to give Awesomez her presents. She called and we coordinated a meeting at the Gelson’s parking lot on Laurel Canyon.

    Many people think Los Angeles is a big place but to this Valley Girl it is really still a small town in so many ways. This was the market where my mother did our shopping when I was a very little girl. Our family had lived about a block away on “Bellingham” – yes, Bellingham. Predictably, Henry hopped in the car with Awesomez after he’d bestowed his gifts upon her. And we all drove over to take a look at the stop sign where my sister and I had tied our jump rope and honed our skills.

    The memory tour on hold for a while, we dropped the car off in a remote airport parking structure, as the thought of Cindy and Laura gnashing their teeth and cursing our names as they took the shuttle sadistically amused us in the hot sunshine.

    From there it was off to drop the lad at his friend’s house for a sleep over. He was going to be staying at Sam and Kimona’s house, the same kids who had stayed with us on the farm for six weeks last summer.
(Sam and Henry)

    Then I worked a miracle of biblical proportion and dragged a more than reluctant Awesomez, who had just driven five hours, shopping at the Topanga Mall. I cashed in an unused gift card I’d still had from an old teacher gift. I scored with a friend working at the mall who gave me her 70% discount and loaned me her shoes. We got back to the hotel with my treasures freshened up and met Tom at Kings Seafood Restaurant in Calabasas for oysters, ceviche, bloody marys and other types of alcohol.

    As usual, we had a great time, but eventually Tom had to get home and I went to the hotel with Lisa. We were just about there when Cindy and Laura called luring us to the Cheesecake Factory for a glass of wine in payment for leaving the car. How could we say no? We couldn’t. So off we went after trekking down Canoga Avenue determined not to pay $14.00 a day to self-park when there is plenty of available parking in the Valley.
(Cynthia Lynn)

(Cindy and Laura)

  (Laura laughs and laughs and laughs)

(Me- Denise)

(Awesomez  and the bunny - Cindy)
(oops- party foul committed- broken wine glass)

    Of course I’d seen Laura recently and Awesomez is now a fixture in my life, but it had been about 20 years since I’d seen Cindy. We sat in the booth as the years melted away in a blink. Suddenly we were shaking with laughter our stomachs aching and tears running down our cheeks. When the waiter finally kicked us out we made our way to room 324 wine in hand. At times we were deep and thoughtful speaking of kids, divorce and our jobs over the years. Stories each of us told about how we got from there to here. We talked about some of our struggles and milestones along the way and then we went online and found out our “Barbie” names: single Laura was Kissy Barbie, type-A Cindy was Angry Barbie, Awesomez who is in transition was Unstable Barbie and I was Garbage Worker Barbie. We laughed ‘til we cried.

April 22nd The Odyssey

     (the San Juan Islands out the window)

(the Cascades)

   An eyelash shy of food stamps these days it was odd to fly the upgrade Lisa got us all at the airport, but non-fat latte in hand I endured the irony of first class. We couldn’t get three seats so Lisa and Henry were together doing a crossword and discussing “Ninety Minutes in Heaven” while I was alone with my thoughts about the events ahead. My trip was painfully scheduled in some ways not allowing for coffee with a friend or a drive to the beach. I was nervous as I looked out the window to the endless sun-soaked sea of swimming pools upon our descent. I hadn’t been back home in two full years.

(Dean at Burbank Airport - helping Henry with his bag)

    Toby and Dean picked us at the airport like no time had passed. Having them back in Los Angeles added to the emotion. The boys chatted in the backseat as we got Lisa’s rental car and all stopped at 7-11 for sodas before Toby and I headed off to Nordstrom Rack while Lisa drove off to Loehman’s (my mom’s very favorite store) and a pedicure.

    As Toby maneuvered the freeway I drank in the warm sunshine. After two years of angst always wondering where to go for things like getting my ring fixed or what restaurant is good it was strangely comforting to know just know where everything is. Every block, every parking space was filled with a lifetime of memories that came flooding back.

Shopping was a bust; although Toby narrowed what I was looking for so I might be able to find an acceptable outfit more easily on my second try. She determined after looking at my bruises, which were now turning an olive green that short sleeves were definitely out of the question.

    Henry, Tom and I reunited at the reported busiest Starbucks in the world located on the corner of Topanga Canyon and Ventura Blvd. We hugged Toby and Dean good-bye for now and moved on to the next leg of our journey.

    Our friends Kathy and Dan, the grandparents of two of my former students Trevor and Ashley offered to take us to dinner. To say Trev and Ashley are simply former students is to say the Great Barrier Reef is just a big bunch of rocks. Trevor and “Ashweena” were part of our family. They went to Yellowstone and Alaska with us. Henry still wears Trevor’s hand-me-downs and receives his castoff Christmas presents. All the kids including Quinn and Phoebe have spent the night together, gone to the beach, camp, had Christmases, birthdays, the zoo, done homework and have even gone to several funerals together. In fact, Trevor, Ashley, Quinn, Henry and Phoebe were together the reason I needed a van in the first place. I hauled the five of them here and there across the valley shleping them to baseball, dance, gymnastics and back and forth from sleepovers. 

(family owned for 47 years)

    We all met up for Mexican food as the supply in Bellingham is scarce. Walking in, I could feel the memories wrap around me like a blanket. I’d been going there with my family since I was eight years old and have sat in probably every booth. There’s the one we went to when my mother got her masters and then the one when we discovered she had cancer, the one I sat in when I turned twenty one and ordered my first margarita, the one where we celebrated my grandfather’s eightieth and the one where we consoled ourselves in after he died, the one we went to when I visited from Minnesota, the one when Lisa had Quinn, The one when my mother died, the one when Henry was afraid of policemen, the ones when we were fixing up the house and I was too tired to cook, the one when Tom decided he wouldn’t leave me for Kim Basinger even though she was in the next booth, the one where we decided to move to Washington. It was the perfect place to be.

(Ashley "Ashweena" )

 (Trevor - "Trevie-Trev-Trev" T-DAWG, my personal - NIGHTMARE)

 

(Henry and Trevor - somethings don't change)

(Ashley watching the boys)

(Our man Dan)
    After an evening of drinks, laughter and catching up, Tom, Henry and I headed to Ventura where Tom is living. There is only one functional bedroom in the house so to Henry’s delight he was relegated to the authentic 1940’s teardrop trailer Tom built piece by piece. The tear-drop has often been our extra bedroom at the Donaldson’s on Christmas or New Year’s Eve. Snug as a bug in a rug Henry was asleep before his head hit the pillow.

(A sleeping Henry still inside the  teardrop the next morning)

April 20th Like Mother Like Daughter

    (Alvin casually observing the day's events)

     After working all morning and just before lunch, I had to carry a bale of hay down to the cows as we're out of round bales. I have a hard time using the wheel barrel on the rocky driveway so I decided to hoist it over my shoulder and muscle it down. "Wow, you're butch!" Alexis called out. Butch? Is that some sort of compliment? Does anyone think that's a compliment even if you're trying to be butch? Awesomez had said perhaps he meant "tough". I was willing to believe this. My mother had always wanted to be strong and I should be grateful for my father's strength. However, Alexis had previously called me a pit bull with lipstick and once told me I looked good compared to my college pictures, healthy; which any woman knows is code for rotund. His comment my house looked "farm house clean" cinched it'; this is not a man pandering to my feminine sensibilites. My college reunion is in less than four days. Determined to make time for myself, I stopped working in the yard and went upstairs to color my hair. I mixed up the color and the developer, donned a pair of gloves and applied to my roots it was then I realized I hadn't put in the essential ingredient, The Grey Magic™, the teeny tiny bottle that kept me from looking like Ma Kettle. I started searching the bathroom shelves. It had to be here. It never left the bathroom and I'd use it in the last time I colored my hair. I started frantically pulling bottles off the shelves and throwing them recklessly to the floor. The dogs were barking downstairs and the noise was adding to my panic. I did not want to mess this up. I shelf after shelf, I moved lotion bottles, tweezer, cotton balls, discarded hair brushes old Velcro™ rollers, teeth whitening strips and pedicure exfoliators. It just wasn't there. I was now screaming to L. Awesomez on speakerphone as she couldn't help but laugh at my somewhat ridiculous predicament. She had room to laugh her color is tomorrow. Clearly she did not fully grasp the emergency in the situation.

    "You can't find what? You're not making sense." She insisted.

    "The Grey Magic™. The Grey Magic™. I need to put it in my hair color. My grey is resistant and won't color."

    "Don't you just buy a box? Doesn't it all come together?" Ugh. Spoken like someone who doesn't color her own hair.

    "No. I don't just buy a box. I go to the beauty supply and buy the developer, the Color Charm™ 5N and mix it together with "un-red" and the The Dang Grey Magic™ I can't find. I am not going to the reunion with grey hair I am not!" I screamed somewhat dramatically. I looked at Irish and wondered if he'd eaten it.

(Irish - guilty until proven innocent)

    "Ahhh, Denise?" Alexis called from downstairs in a voice that somehow conveyed he was not alone. It was something in his tone. I was silent. "Uhh yessss," I answered sweetly in "Steel Magnolia" fashion.

    "The gentlemen who wanted to see the aprtment stopped by and would like to take a look. We can tell you're a busy right now so I'll take him over. Why don't you come down in a couple of minutes. " He suggested.

    "Sounds good, I'll be right there!" I called back in my best hostess voice. "What's going on?" Awesomez asked still on speakerphone. "Some guy is here to see the apartment and I have to go down and talk to him, but my hair is covered in hair dye and I still can't find the Grey Magic™ I feel like Im living an 'I Love Lucy' episode I'll have to call you later. I said trying to figure out my next move. Come down? What the heck, my hair was saturated with medium brown semi-permanent hair dye and I didn't have enough product to rinse it out do it again. Like a flash my memory brought forward a long forgotten story my mother had told me many times.

(Spring has sprung)

    Growing up little Christina Mary Gabrielle Haenel lived in Hancock Park, California the daughter of two German doctors. She went to a very strict Catholic school, Immaculate Heart High, where she was taught by nuns in full habit during the ultra uptight fifties. Her friends were the daughters of prominent families like the The John Waynes and the Bing Crosbys, as well as talented, but not as affluent Mary (Tyler) Moore. Still, my mother, my inspiration was a rebel in her own silly way. She told me how one day during math. She'd done it and looked Sister Mary Robert straight in the eye while she sat there turning from mousey brown to blond. She told me this story giggling with laughter tears running down her cheeks.

    I gathered myself, found a clip wound the ends up and clipped it in back. Took off my robe slipped into my coveralls and taking the hair dye applicator brush painted my disheveled hair into a general semblance of order.

    I took a page from my sister's book, thought of having Oprah's money and marched down the stairs chin up.

    By this time, Alexis and the guy in the neon vest had seen the place and were marking time until I appeared.

    "Hello, I'm Denise. As luck would have it, this time I've met someone while coloring my hair. I do hope you have a sister." I said extending my hand.

    The man smiled back nodding and said, "I'm married too."

    "I'm going to my college reunion." I elaborated as if this explained everything. Both men laughed making statements like "I'm glad I'm a guy".

    "Well, it's this or I might look butch" I said. Alexis looked up knowing he was busted.

    After all the negotiations,I went back up stairs to check on my roots and there sitting on the back of the shelf was the Grey Magic™, I mixed a generous amount into the remaining color and reapplied.

    Luckily, all went well. I say luckily, as I have had to call the clairol hair color hotline when I made a fatal error and turned my hair Bozo the clown orange. After a quick blow dry, tan application and a touch of lip-gloss, I went downstairs.

    Alexis was in from the fence eating a late lunch. "You clean up good." He said smiling. "You're aging like a fine wine." He added obviously trying to make up for his sins. I'm easy it worked.

April 19th A Small Step

  (Miracle can't believe it - boys working) 

(boys working - Justin and Henry)

    After helping us with the fence, Henry and Justin had the audacity to want to go to the pond in what I consider freezing weather. It's true the sun was shining, but there was a bite in the air as the sun started to slip behind the mountains. I'm not eleven, so if Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer want to swim, who am I to stand in their way? They walked ahead to the pond while Alexis and I pounded in another bit of our now impressive run of fence.

(Henry & Justin walk to the pond with Vivian and Luther)

(Prepared for work)

    Nervous, about water and children, and wondering if they'd listen to my rules when I wasn't there, Alexis and I drove out to the pond sooner than later. Pulling up, I was delighted to see two boys heeding my words. I sat on the shore watching the pair of Canada geese who'd settled in for the spring. Henry would honk at them and they'd honk back. I wondered if they were the parents of the goslings we'd had here two years ago. They return to the same pond every year ala' "Fly Away Home".

(Henry lounges)

(Old friends?)

(Me and Bruno by the pond)

I thought of our goslings and Clara. I'm struggling not to get attached. I try not to handle them knowing I want to sell them, but I can't really sell them without a viable boy. So I'm waiting patiently for Mabel/Ruthie's hatch. Certain at this point they're waiting for me to leave town to birth those babies.

    Sure we have Colt and he's a fighter, but he still has one droopy eye and is a fraction of the size of his big fluffy sisters. He is making progress, when Alexis puts him outside with the others he definitely tries to forage. The girls are constantly eating. Ripping grass, roots and anything their little heart desires goes in their stomach. Colt will run behind them and mimic them but not necessarily eat. Often times, he still has to be put in the water to remind him to drink and Alexis still brings him in every night and puts him under the heat lamp to keep him a snug 90 degrees.

    I watched him in the baby pool the other day. All the other gosling girls went over the edge of the baby pool like track stars, but Colt, well, he had a difficult time jumping out. Time after time he tried hopping and stepping over the edge. Henry and I desperately wanted to help him, but we knew had to do it on his own if he was going to be out here. So we sat back hoping he'd make it. And, after a painful long time, he clumsily stumbled over a rousing applause. A giant leap forward in his chances for survival.

(trying)

(trying)

(success!)

(Colt and his ginormous sisters)

(Little Colt looking at Mama)

    I've been feeling a little sorry for myself lately, and in truth I'm a fairly lazy person at heart, but when I watch the little guy, I wonder how I have the nerve to complain. He was struggled and fought for every breath, drink and morsel. As I see him try so desperately to keep up, it makes me pause and reevaluate my life. Truthfully, the struggles I've endured have brought me tenfold in reward. It sound sappy I know, way more Melanie than my usual Scarlet perspective. I've learned I can tote water for weeks on end if I have to; in true Scarlet fashion. I've realized I can make a myriad of inexpensive refrigerator surprise dinners, I've benefited from the kindness of strangers and found friends in people I never dreamed cared. I discovered a friend I thought I'd lost forever just to find she's really a guardian angel in disguise. I've learned to hold on to hope and put one foot in front of the other.

(Justin snorkles)

April 18th Hammered

(a lovely spring day in Bellingham)

    Yesterday, I cleaned Henry’s armpit of a room. Not a job I relished, but I donned my stylish pink rubber clothes and took pity on the little tike because he had a brand new friend, Justin, coming over for the weekend. And because much of the problem was due to Deli. That ding,dang dog doesn’t behave in any shape or form. She runs away she digs out of the yard; she sneaks up on my good sofa when I leave the room and she pees in Henry’s closet if he leaves anything on the floor. Can’t shoot her, I promised my father. I have to say she has soft velvety ears.

    After dropping off an employment application at Youngstocks - vegetable stand, I arrived just before 3:00 to pick up the boys. I had been warned not to be late. Justin’s father was already dutifully in the parking lot with all of Justin’s paraphernalia. Justin’s father imparted all sorts of last minute reminders to Justin regarding his manners, the rules and what would be the longest ride of his life if he had to pick him up and take him home. He even gave time limits on electronics and I loved it. Finally a parent.

    The boys were like two peas in a pod from the moment we got home. They did start out the afternoon with the familiar. Choosing to play a video game Awesomez gave Henry, but then they moved on to pool and darts. On the second floor I could hear Cool and the Gang blasting “Celebrate Good Times”, followed by Patsy Cline and Ozomatli. I peeked in and found them dancing on top of the furniture. They ate pizza, and talked about their favorite teachers while they were settling in to watch “Are We There Yet”. I could hear

(Henry taking his shot - juke box blaring- as I hoped it would eventually)

(snacks)

    “So I’m your best friend at school then?” Henry queried as the pocket doors closed cutting off my opportunity to listen. Short of putting a cup up to the door, that’s all I could hear.

    A little later Henry came out to the kitchen and whispered “Do you like him mom?” He asked eagerly his eyes shining. “Did you notice he said ‘thank you’ when you gave him dinner?”

    “I do like him and I did notice.” I said enjoying the look on Henry’s gleaming face. “Do you?”

    “I think he's great. I’m having so much fun. We think alike.” He said running back to the movie. My heart soared as I thought - you really only need one good friend to get you through the tough times.

    Growing up I didn’t have a "best friend", my mother said I could be smothering. So instead I had a few friends, JoAnn Schmidt, May Lee, Catherine McDonald, Girl Scout Troop 628 and of course, my sister. Middle school can be a lonely place, but who wants to peak in middle school? Anyway, it all looked good, they were laughing and talking a mile a minute. They pulled out the sofa bed in the family room and slowed down. Whispering, which meant I no longer had any chance to eavesdrop, so I went to bed.

    In the morning, I made the now regular Chai waffles doused in melted butter and hot maple syrup with generous glasses of Sunny D™ before I went outside to join Alexis. We were starting the fence today. “Here’s the deal, you’re outside today, no TV, GameBoy™, computer or any other electronic device. OK?” My mother used to lock me outside all day I was following her lead.

    “That’s OK, we’re going to the pond.” Henry assured me. “Just as soon as we get our shoes on.”

    “Great, take an air horn and don’t blow it unless there’s a problem. Promise?”

    “Promise.”

    “Have fun!!!” I called clad in my coveralls prepared for a day’s labor.

    Alexis and I walked off posts, slammed them into the ground, and cut branches so we could put more posts in the ground.

(Essential for a productive day)

(Alexis and I took turns putting posts in the ground with my good old post pounder)

(the Costco size staple container - you always need them)

(Holding the rope - until we need to pull tight)

Putting up the wire proved a bit more difficult. We hammered staples into a wooden post, unrolled the wire weave and then tied it to the tractor. I turned the tractor pulling the wire tight then we went back and hammered the rest of the staples in securing it in place. The hammering of the staples was a pain because the post would wiggle and loosen with every SLAMM of the hammer. So, Alexis would hammer them because I begrudgingly admitted he was stronger and I would be the human brace. Relegated once again to the usefulness of a 2X4. One by one we got them in the ground and secured.

(Denise holds the stake in place)

(Alexis puts a bruise on my arm- actually up and down the entire left side of my body.)

(Alexis really put all his effort into his work)

    About 2:00PM two happy, dirty boys came home from the pond.  I fixed them ham and cheese sandwiches with a few apples and Doritos Cool Ranch™. They went in and turned on the TV.

    “Uhh boys? I thought I told you you’re outside?” I reminded escalating my disapproving teacher tone.

    “But Mom, we were just at the pond for a long time. We’re going to relax.” Henry argued.

    "You need a rest? You're eleven. Your grandfather closes the streets of Paris playing jazz, go outside"

    "But Mama, just one game?"

    “Outside. Take your plates, your drinks and get.” I said now employing the infamous teacher look. At this Justin had miserable written all over his face. “Oh look it seems we’ve gotten Justin just in time to save him from slipping into a digital world.” I taunted somewhat gleefully enjoying their pain.

    “Can't we play pool?” Justin asked almost pathetically.

    “Nope. You might as well know Justin, I’m mean. Really so just accept it and both of you take your plates.”

    “But what is there to do?” Henry said.

    “Well, you could climb a tree, clean out the barn, shoot arrows, make up a game or, Alexis and I could use your help building the fence.”

    “There are no good trees.”

    “We live in a forest Henry.”

    "We’re going. Can we use the laptop outside to write a story?” Henry pleaded.

    “No. Go.”

    “But MOM! To write a story.” He thought he’d played on my sympathy, but I was raised not to blink. I was the mom who turned the car around when we were on our way to the zoo – it was a too hot August day anyway-.

    “Use a pencil.” I countered. “Or come on, we could use your help.” I got the old eye roll from Justin as they went out the door.
(trying desperately not to be bored)

(Justin with a bow in hand looking for something - anything)

    I went back to work. Peering over to where they were sitting in the grass I couldn’t see them and suspected they might have gone inside, but no they were milling around climbing on things talking. Driving the tractor up to the burn pile pulling a large limb I’d sawed off an overgrown apple tree, I heard Justin shout “Salamander!” 

(Salamander!)

    “Mom! There’s a salamander and eggs! Thousands of them!”

    “Well, don’t disturb them.”

    “We kind of did. We’ll put them back.”  Henry said sheepishly.

     They stared in the water for a long time, and then went around hitting the weeds in the path of our fence line with machetes before finally disappearing into the house about dark.

(Salamander returning from whence he came)

(Justin and Henry near the old sunken bathtub where the salamander lives)

(Angus - with his curls - he looks a little like he's wearing a Colonial wig)

(Colt making himself warm on top of his sisters)

    After I’d closed up the barn and fed the cows I knew I could relax once I’d thrown some food at the wild eleven-year olds. Walking in I picked up the still blank spiral notebook and pencil the boys had left on the grass.

    “Mom, you know after you said we couldn’t stay inside, we had a really great time.”

    “Yeah, we saw that salamander and then we made up our own world, it was great. We had an even better time than if we’d played video games. I’m glad we didn’t stay inside. Thanks!” Justin said as he went into turn on the TV.

    Thanks? Did that child just say thanks?  Funny, I don't remember opening the fancy tequila.

April 15th Local Color

   

    As we drove to school this morning Henry told me all about his desire to be on the track team. “I really want to do the hurdles and the shot-put and the softball throw.” He said excitedly.

    “You sound like you had a lot of fun yesterday.”

    “I did, I think I like track maybe better than wrestling. There’s more to do.”

    “Uhhhh you know. I was talking to Lisa last night.”

    “Which one?”

    “Awesomez, and she said you told her about the softball throw and apparently you told her the only thing I can throw is a party.” I glared at him.

    “You throw a great party?” He said meekly as he winced shrinking in his seat.

    “I’ll have you know, I have tried very hard for many years to learn how to throw a softball. Eric Fulton tried to teach me in the 8th grde. Your father has worked with me. Barb Jordan tried her best, Trevor, the P.E, coaches at Woodland Hills and too many 5th grade boys to count. You’re mean, mean and rotten. Lisa said she’s willing to teach me and in fact she thinks she’s going be the one to teach me.

    “Good luck." The little punk said under his breath.

    "What?"

    Well, if anyone can” He said, “The Awesomez can. She’s patient Mama. She won’t yell at you.”

    “I throw a great party.”

    “Mama throws a great party.” He repeated in a condescending tone.

    “Oh hush.”

    Home from Cancun, Lisa and I agreed to meet at Larabee Elementary School where Phoebe is a “Lara-Bee”.

(Phoebe with her braids from Cancun)

(Larabee Elementary)

Neither of us had eaten, so to catch up we decided go for breakfast at the Food Co-op. Pulling in the parking lot where Birkenstocks™ abound, it’s easy to tell The Food Co-op is the Topanga Canyon/Santa Monica of Bellingham. I applied for a job here and made the mistake of wearing my maple sugar lipstick. I’d been worried I didn’t look professional enough, but then realized I wasn’t going to get anywhere with this company as my hair was brushed and I had in fact, I had bathed within the last week.

(note Lisa's van with Tule™ and street musician on left)

(Food Co-op bike rack)

    As we stood in line for potentially the best coffee in Washington, I happily remembered Lent was over and ordered a non-fat latte. Extra hot. We both got a bowl of oatmeal and Lisa did some experimenting with something called “Old World” cereal. The girl behind the counter pointed to the other container and said, “This is like Malt-O-Meal” a little hesitantly. Feeling adventurous I dipped into the vat of cereal and put some in my bowl.

(breakfast is served)

    We sat down in front of a window in the warm sunshine after moving our chairs away from another patron whose aroma was a little pungent. I looked at Lisa across the table. She had a glow about her; she wasn’t fish belly white anymore. She was tan and I was green, but I consoled myself with the fact I could buy a tan at the store. Each of us took a bite of our breakfast. She nodded considering the Old World option though obviously not loving it by the way her nose crinkled up. I spit mine out in a napkin. It wasn’t anything like Malt-o-Meal and come to think of it I never really liked Malt-O-Meal anyway.

(some customers enjoying the warm sun)

    “Yeah, I was a little suspect when she said that.” Lisa acknowledged. “Malt-O-Meal never had those stringy things in it.” She was right I thought with disgust.

    “So tell me how was Mexico?” I said sitting back basking in the sun in no particular hurry. After all I could look for more jobs that were going to reject me later.

    “Well, I ate like a pig and drank like a sailor. “ She laughed, “I really couldn’t count how many margaritas I had, but the best part is they come in to-go cups.” She said with a mischievous smile. I took a leisurely sip of my latte as she began to relay the rest of the Donaldsons’ Spring Break Adventures including their nighttime trip to the ruins, the exciting sea turtle sightings – a sort of Easter Hunt, the technical improvements of scuba gear, the thatched roof in Cozumel, an incident resulting in a  broken camera, and ending with a nervous Phoebe coming face to face with a toothy barracuda.

    After a healthy amount of people watching we went our separate ways. She to a vegetable stand and I headed home to color my hair. The drive was a spectacular display of green.

(ready for someone's spring garden)

(the flowering trees)

(our little Bellingham vineyard)

(prop plane flying way too close for my comfort)

The hills ranged in color from asparagus to forest to the color of Granny Smith apples while the trees were jungle, mountain meadow and pine. Spring. A few eagles still fly over-head but now robins fly kamikaze in front of the cars playing some deadly game of chicken.

(eagle flying close over Mosquito Lake Road - pulled my car over- prefer the eagle to the plane)

Birds and their birdbrains are a complete mystery to me. The phone rang. It was Lisa the vegetable stand was looking for help so she got me an application. The drive was relaxing I pictured myself at the vegetable stand. Visualization. On a whim I pulled in to the IGA to pick up a bottle of instant tan. It was on sale. The woman at the checkout was tall, thin, had funny little glasses and rather protruding teeth. As I stood there swiping my card I chuckled picturing her swimming in the warm aquamarine waters– she did look very much like a barracuda.

(Andy enjoying the new grass in the pasture)

April 13th Kill Bill

   

(Luther crosses the log by the pond)

(Henry praising Luther for his efforts)


    The days are getting longer which means there’s plenty of time to play outside after school. Henry’s taking some time off from everything to do nothing. Time to just hang out and let his imagination take over.

    Mike stopped by on his way back to Tacoma, as Annie has now taken over the dog sitting duties until the Donaldson’s return from their Mexican vacation. We glanced outside periodically to see what Huck Finn was up to, with our afternoon coffee in hand we weren’t surprised to see Henry scurrying around the Kubota™ barn. It seems he was gathering old ski poles, left over PVC piping, detached garden stakes, duct tape and discarded metal pipe.

    Mike peeked again a while later. “Uh Denise, you’d better take a look.” I got up and went to the window just in time to see Henry launching a rickety spear through the air at a tree.

(Henry is no tree hugger)

    “Henry!!! Didn’t you read the ‘Giving Tree’? Please, please make your old mother happy and find something else to aim at like a target.”

    “OK Mama, but I don’t think the trees mind. I’m not really hurting them.”

    “Humor me.” I said flatly.

    Not too long later he’d roped Alexis into the act and the two of them were throwing spears at a spray painted bale of hay tied to the Kubota™ barn. The target was dubbed Billy. There were points for hitting Billy’s head, Billy’s heart and Billy’s family jewels – Henry was an apparent lock for the crotch shot. He’d hurl his spear through the air and BAMMM it would hit sticking right between Billy’s spray painted hay legs.

(Henry let's it fly-he must have attended the school Ed Ames school of tomahawk throwing on The Tonight Show)

(Alexis aims and throws)

(Mike scrutinizing Henry's form)

 “Oh Yeah!” Henry would yell leaping in the air as the other men nodded in approval. Mike had watched a bit but soon took off his jacket and handed it to Alexis as he tried lobbing a spear at Billy.

    “It’s not easy is it?” Mike remarked.

    “Why don’t you stand up here closer?” Henry politely suggested.

    “Because I want to stand back here.” Mike said indignantly.

    “It’s hard to hit unless you’re the crotch-master like the boy here.” Alexis said anointing Henry. After a while I tired and went inside to get some work done, but I couldn’t resist my hand at it when Henry came in the house carrying my own personal spear painted with a custom crimson tip. It was very long almost 12 feet.

    “I made this for the Mama.” He said proudly. Then seeing me eye its length Henry added, “I found the longer ones work better.” My own personal spear? It’s not something you register for, or even know you want. Heck, I’d never ever thought of having a spear before, but it looked like fun. It was fun, stress reducing and challenging. We spent the entire afternoon trying to hit our target.

(Mama gets in the act)

We aimed, chucked, propelled launched and manically plunged our makeshift spears into poor woebegone Billy. And in some base-level-mother-of-an-eleven-year-old-boy-Lord-of-the-Flies-way, I loved it.
(Henry and his arsenal)

April 12th Great Expectations

   

(tucked in the mama)

    Easters are supposed to be blue skies sundresses, sandals, tulips and quirky bonnets, but in reality even in California they're often dreary, rainy days. I remember Henry's first Easter dressed as a little sailor complete with hat at the Descanso Gardens egg hunt. It poured unrelentingly as soggy toddlers dragged their brightly colored baskets through the mud while mothers and fathers hovered trying to keep umbrellas over them as they dodged about looking for plastic treasures filled with goodies.

    The one thing, for as long as I can remember. I could count on is my sister. When we were young she would walk in my room every Easter saying “He is Risen!” Even after we no longer lived together, and no matter what time zone either one of us were in,  I would hear the phone ring and “He is Risen!” would be the words I would expect.

    A bit of melancholy swept over me as I knew this Easter would be different. Lisa and Chris are in Cancun with the girls and we had decided it would just be too expensive for her to be calling me with the ridiculous inflated roaming charges on her cell phone. They knew the dogs were fine Mike was taking care of them and I knew their hotel in case of emergency. Everything else could wait.

    No matter, the day burst open when Henry woke up, sprang out of bed, raced down the stairs screaming “Easter bunny bawlk, bawlk” as he struggled to get out the front door to see if there was indeed an Easter basket waiting for him on the other side. I say struggled to get out the front door, because like many things that weren’t done exactly right on this house, our door handles are falling off one by one and he has to use a key or a screwdriver to unlatch the latch. But I’ll think about that tomorrow.
(Henry's Easter basket filled with his favorites, broccoli, veggie vitamins, tangerine scrub, Pirate Booty, a Coke™, chocolate covered pretzels, Chai tea, and of course Toblerone™)

(Easter Bunny - my what big ears you have)

(Easter Bunny?)
(Happy Henry)

    The rest of the morning was filled with brunch preparations. Including the quartering of strawberries, tearing of spinach, candying of walnuts, crumbling of Gorgonzola, the tying of bows and ironing of tablecloths and of course there was going out in the pouring rain in my boots and pajamas clippers in hand trolling the ditches for flowers to put on the table.

(Oranges)

(Easter flower/weed centerpieces)

Henry obeyed orders. “Get another small tablecloth, make the waffle batter, tie pink bows, find more bunnies, set up the waffle making station, look for napkins…”barked at him over the din of Alexis’ vacuuming.

(mason jars full of flowers and weeds, my mother's German bunnies, and paper cups filled with cinnamon-nutmeg waffle batter)

    “Henry, I really want you to remember your manners when the Rudy’s arrive. I don’t want you to eat like wolf-boy.” I said as I wiped the counter.

    “Do I have to eat everything?”

    “Well, I’d like you to try everything at least one bite. I don’t know if Trevin and Austin will, but you should.”

    “Austin will I’m sure he eats salad he’s thirteen.”

    “So is thirteen a magic number?”

    “Well, Austin's mature. In some religions, like if you’re Jewish it means you’re grown up.

    "But Austin's not Jewish."

    "No, look at Michael he had his Bar Mitzvah.”

    “Hmm, you’re holding the younger Ungar up as your example of grown up? Seriously? And what if you’re Catholic?”

    “You’re still a kid.”

    “Huh so then you don't have to eat salad?”

    "Right."

    When the guests arrived, the table was set, the coffee was brewed, the quiche hot and the champagne cold. We began with mimosas and deviled eggs while the kids went out to the barn to see if any more goslings had hatched.
(Dave and Kim celebrate)

(Goosedown snuggy)

(Dave instructs Trevin)

(Mike getting worked into a point of view)

The boys played pool while the jukebox blared and we chatted. Mike gave a couple rants about educational systems and other social ills and then we moved on to our meal eventually rounding out a wonderful afternoon with a rousing game of Apples to Apples™.

(Mike dipping into the strawberry/spinach/walnut/gorgonzola salad)

(Denise (in the blouse Laura gave me) and her 15th mimosa?)

(Austin after a trip to the waffle station)

  (Kim's cupcakes)

(Alexis judges the cards to Trevin's amusement)

(Denise and Henry- if only my hair wasn't in my face, I wasn't hunched over like Yoda and Henry's glassed didn't cover his eyes - this would be a nice picture)

(Irish always willing to help make sure all the crumbs are cleared)

    After the guests were gone and the dishes were done, I went out to my car to get some things I needed. As I slipped into the cold driver’s seat to get out of the rain, I heard my cell phone beep. Unusual for here as we don’t get reception, but as I leaned slightly to the left I got just a bar and a text message appeared “He is Risen!”

April 8th The Miracle Of Life

  (Clara and her girls - one is tucked safely under her wing)

    The thick grey skies seemed to mirror our mood this morning. The death of Clyde has left everyone here a bit somber. We’re not running around crying all the time, but it’s sort of taken the wind out of our sails. Henry has forgiven Vivian for her crime, realizing she had no malintent, but it doesn’t take away the pain.

    We moped about a bit in the morning fixing breakfast. Alexis feeding and carrying around Colter who has yet to fully rejoin his family. Mike came out for a visit since he’s house sitting for Lisa & Chris who cashed in frequent flier miles and flew south for a sunny Cancun vacation with the girls. In an attempt to right the ship Mike Henry and I decided to go out to the barn to candle Ruthie and Mabel’s eggs wondering if there was even a possibility of more goslings. It was amazing how all the animals responded to Mike even Scarlett who harbors Greta-Garbo-ways came out to pay homage to the man who would supply her ham every morning when he lived here.

    To our delight quite a few of the eggs looked dark and filled with the promise of new life. Our spirits soared. “Mama we’re going to have more babies! I think they’ll be here within the week.” My little farm boy predicted.

    “I thin you’re right Babalouie.”  I said, “You know we’re really very lucky. We haven’t lost a lamb or a goat even though we’ve seen plenty of coyote and of course the cougar”

    “Of course we’ve found a lot of scat from bear under the apple trees even though we haven’t seen them. We know they’re there.” Mike added.

    “And bobcat?” Henry reminded me.

    “True there was the bobcat in the pasture, but we’ve only lost one little life in almost two years.”

    “From our own dog.” Henry emphasized.

    “Can you imagine how horrible it would have been if the first life lost was Riley’s?” Mike asked.

    “That would have been horrible, his carcass ripped open.” 

    “Mom!”

    “Well, it could have happened. It’s happened to a lot of people I’ve talked to. The game warden and I discussed it at length. So the loss of Clyde no matter how terrible has to be put in perspective. It’s really quite remarkable and the only reason is Miracle.” I said going over to give her the cookie she was begging for. “She’s turned out to be an amazing guardian.”

    Miracle stood there begging for cookies like an overgrown basset hound absorbing the praise, all the while her ears turning around tuning in every sound always alert.

Introducing: Miracle The Wonder Donkey with Tom accompanied by Grandpa Horn's music.

April 7th In A Heartbeat

(The first daunting apple tree)

    It was a stunningly beautiful day one of those days that demand you go outside. The hot sun shone brightly as I began the seemingly endless task of pruning the apple trees. Time is of the essence because with spring approaching the trees need to be pruned before they begin to bud, or we will have another year of mediocre apples. Some of the trees haven’t ever been pruned while others look in pretty good shape.  I gathered a ladder, pruners, a limb saw, consulted my Western Gardner handbook and went to work.

    My mother used to love trimming trees. "It's like giving him a nice haircut," she'd say as she hacked away. I thought of her while I sat in the tree sawing alone with my thoughts. The limbs were huge,and my arms were soon sore. I ached but I refused to consider using a chainsaw when I'd have to lift it higher than my waist and especially when I'd have to be on a ladder. Instead, I consoled myself with  the toning I was doing.

(limb successfully removed)

(Denise - me - in the apple tree working)

(Henry brings Mama some much needed water)

    Henry started out strong on his list of chores. He gave Irish a much needed bath and brushing, washed a rug from upstairs and put it in the sun to dry, picked up dog poop revealed by melting snow and that’s about where he stopped. Somehow he began fashioning spears and throwing them at trees. Soon he had Alexis throwing them and creating his own spears. The rest of the day we all spent outside in the sun, me in my apple trees and the boys on the lawn playing Lord of the Flies while Clyde, Colter and their sisters puttered about contentedly peeping in the vegetable garden that begged weeding. Miracle ran a round kicking up her heels, the goats nibbled pine needles and the dogs rested in the shade. All but Luther who basked in the sun. I didn’t even let the rest of the pterodactyls out so we’d have some peace.

(Vivian with the huge bone she found - Irish has an even bigger one - Lisa thought it could be elk parts)

    As the sun disappeared it got cool fast so we began the task of taking our newest goose family into the barn. I picked up Lloyd and Clara while Alexis attended to the goslings. He’d picked up three when Henry came out of the barn.

    “Henry, can you come in here and get the last two goslings?” I asked.

    “Sure.” He said as he pushed the flimsy chicken wire gate aside. He circled around and went toward the goslings who instinctively ran. Catching goslings is like trying to catch drops of water.

    I looked over my shoulder and could see Vivian at the entrance of the garden. I screamed at her to stay back but Vivian, seeing Henry trying to catch the goslings, instinctively tried to help. She leapt toward the goslings. I was helpless; the goslings were helpless as I held their protectors Lloyd and Clara in my arms. Henry tried to grab her, but she was too fast. And in an instant Clyde was dead. His little wing contorted, as he lay on the ground lifeless.

    “Is he dead? Is he dead? No! He can’t be dead! She killed him! I hate her!” Henry screamed tears running down his face. He pulled his glasses aside to wipe his tears his body shaking.

    Fiercely, I grabbed Vivian by the collar and locked her in the back yard. Then I just held my sobbing son. It was my fault. From the moment I saw her at the edge of the garden, I knew what she would do she’d always charged the geese as I picked them up. Until now she never came close to hurting one. I don’t think she meant to kill it. I don’t even think she knew he died. During times of grief and regret your mind thinks funny things. As I held Henry, I thought of “Galaxy Quest.” The silly movie with Tim Allen where there’s a powerful weapon that turns time back just a few seconds. If only.

    Raw with grief, Henry went in the house to call my sister while Alexis and I chose a spot for our new pet cemetery knowing that although this was the first death on the farm, there would be others. We chose a nice spot in a grove of trees. I got the spade out of the barn. Solemnly, Alexis dug the hole tears heavy in his eyes while I got a linen napkin to wrap the body. In the cold as it grew dark we spoke softly of tiny spirits and being one with the Universe, the cycle of life and ashes to ashes. I thought of the candeling and how short a time Clyde had had with his family.

(the area)

(a spring napkin)

(Alexis wrapping Clyde's body)

  (The burial site)

     Afterward I went into to check on Lloyd, Clara and the girls. Lloyd and Clara were highly agitated. They kept counting their babies and knew one was missing. I climbed in their pen and sat with them while watching the loss they so obviously felt. “I’m so sorry I let you down my friend.” I apologized to Lloyd. "I kept you from protecting your babies. I didn't mean to really. Can you ever forgive me?" I had no tears. Alexis who’d put Colter in the house brought him out and put him with the others so they could count five again.

    “ I talked to Lisa and Phoebe,” Henry said sadly when I finally came inside.

    “What did they say?” I asked quietly.

    “Phoebe cried and Lisa told me about your dogs and your bunny. She told me lots of things. She calmed me down.” He replied.

    “Did she tell you about Max and Maxine?” I asked.

    “Yes.” He said.

    “Our neighbors who raised chickens told my parents we were supposed to tie the bodies of the chicks around the dogs necks to let them rot and teach them never to do that again.” I explained.

    “I don’t want to do that. I couldn’t’ take it.” Henry said.

    “No. I couldn’t either.”

    "I talked to Awesomez too."

    "Oh yeah, what did she say?"

    "She said to remember the pig farmer and that Clyde's last day was happy with his family."

    "So they both made you feel better?"

    “Yeah, I couldn't get a hold of Daddy. Mama?" He said with such pain in his voice it hurt my heart. "I wish it didn’t happen. I see Vivian differently now - everything has changed.”

April 6th Family Affair

(Alexis' charge)

    After 24 hours of driving in three days, we slept like the dead, surrounded by our menagerie. I woke up and started the coffee. Tom was close behind followed by Henry. Anxious to see the babies we chatted excitedly about going out to the barn, when suddenly Alexis appeared in the kitchen with a gosling wrapped in a towel.It seems the poor thing had gotten lodged between the nest and the wall.

    “I’m not sure how long she was there before I got her out. She couldn’t hold her head up. It would just flop over and she wasn’t strong enough to move so I brought her in and we’ve been together ever since. I’ve been feeding her colostrum with an eyedropper. It’s after all a cure all for almost everything. I named her Anne because she’s a survivor like Anne Frank.” Alexis explained.

    My first thought was a slight twinge of jealousy. Alexis was caring for the baby and I wasn’t. I should have been here. In a flash my feelings turned to overwhelming gratitude. I was so fortunate he’d been here to save the little one and lucky he’d taken the initiative to care for the hatchling. I wondered about the name. Anne Frank didn’t really survive did she? And I’m not sure, but think it’s a boy. The bill was sort of dark so it was ambiguous. Finally, I wasn’t sure feeding colostrum was a good idea, as birds didn’t produce it, only mammals.

    “Well, my sister and the girls are coming out today to see the goslings so she can take a look at the little fella.” I said more to myself than anyone.

    After taking a good look at Alexis’ new charge. We bolted outside to see our babies’ babies. It was so exciting to see Lloyd and Clara out in the yard using the crevice from the tractor as a tiny swimming hole for their brood. Lloyd came up and greeted us while Clara sat demurely with her peeps as they peep, peep, peeped. I didn’t like the idea of the tractor track water possibly from the compost as their bath so we moved the family over closer to the barn.
(meeting the family)

(Mama and babies)

    Sitting in the sun sipping coffee as Henry lay on the ground as close as he could to the goslings we were riveted by the new family. The excitement at seeing the babies with Lloyd and Clara is almost indescribable. It was amazing what a good mother and father Lloyd and Clara were protecting and counting their babies completely by instinct as they were here on their second day of life without ever being with a parent. Just then, Lisa and the girls rolled up.

    The doors opened and the girls raced across the driveway shrieking as everyone met the new babies. And once again Alexis appeared cradling his towel wrapped charge. I explained to Lisa what was going on ending with “…Anne Frank, because she was a survivor.”

(farm camo-Romaine lettuce)

(About to take a dip)

(Clara and her babies after a swim)

(struggle for snuggle)

(Alexis and Lisa chat about bird health)

    “But uhh, she didn’t ultimately make it.” Lisa said trying to be gentle. We were on the same page. “And I don’t know about the colostrum.” She worried. “It might be a negative in a bird.”

    “It looks like a boy.” Phoebe insisted and we all agreed. “There are two boys and three girls. See look at their bills. With Cotton Patch you can tell right away.” Farm-girl Phoebe explained.

    “Maybe you could call him Frank?” Lisa suggested.

    Suddenly, as we we’re standing in the warm sun watching the new family eat Vivian came creeping out of the barn. Turning I saw she had an egg in her mouth! She came running out and scurried off into some tall grass where she put the egg down and sat near it.

(Vivian carries the egg)

    “Alexis! Remember that egg I found on the lawn the other day? Maybe it wasn’t new. Maybe Vivian put it there.” I surmised just as she went into the barn and got another egg laying it in another location.

    “She’s being gentle. Does she want to eat it? Or hatch it?” Quinn asked amongst the laughter. The day was filled with sunshine and rebirth. Vivian and her antics seemed to add to the carnival atmosphere. Anything seemed possible even a rottweiler hatching an egg. Although we all agreed Luther was better suited.

(Vivian with "her" egg)

    I suspected however, she was not acting with maternal intent rather I thought she was more Templeton the rat. Especially, once we confirmed these were Clara’s abandoned eggs. The ones she stopped sitting on when the others were hatched. It didn’t take long to verify this when one of the eggs cracked open and a smell beyond compare wafted through the air amid screams of disgust. Vivian tried to roll in it while Tom gathered the rotten goose eggs and disposed of them.

    With an egg stealer on the loose, and three crazy ganders we decided to enclose Lloyd and his family in the vegetable garden where they would be safe. I worried about the other ganders they were acting wild. We decided they needed to be incarcerated. So I picked up Quackmire to put him in the flower garden and he bit me. Not a love bite, a hard bite on my tricep. The pain took my breath away and brought tears to my eyes partially because it was excruciating and partially because he’d hurt my feelings. Quackmire bit me? Really? Really? Are you kidding’ me?

(Quackmire's handy work)

    “What are we going to do Mama? Are we going to get rid of Quackmire too?” Henry asked.

    “I don’t know. My mother always said: When you don’t know what to do, don’t do anything. Right now, the only thing I can promise is we’re keeping Lloyd and Clara. I’m not promising anything else. We only have one healthy boy gosling at the moment so I don’t know if I can even sell a breeding pair yet. We have to see if any of Mabel’s eggs hatch.”
(Tom drills the ends of the eggs)

(Henry blows the yolk)

(Tom blows his egg)

    Once Quackmire, Cleveland and Alfred were enclosed we went inside to blow the unfertilized goose eggs for Easter. Tom got his drill while Henry and Alexis with Phoebe’s help decided to use the high falutin’ Veeta-Vita-Vegi-Mix Tom won and create a lettuce smoothie for the little guy, “Frank?” They didn’t make it too thick or too thin, but just right so the little boy could gain some strength and go back out with his brother and sisters. He was definitely improving.

(Henry pours Romaine Smoothie, while Phoebe and Alexis care for the gosling)

(Happy Phoebe)

(Eyedropper feeding session)

    During the eyedropper feeding session in between prying the gosling’s bill open Henry told Alexis the story of John Colter and before long the struggling little boy was being called Colt while his healthy brother had been named Clyde for Bonnie and Clyde.

(Clara with a little girl - dark bill- and healthy boy - Clyde with the lighter bill on right)

     That didn't end well either I thought as I worried about all this naming. I know I don’t want to become the crazy goose lady of Mosquito Lake Road some of them are definitely leaving.

April 4th Iron Man

 

  (on the road) 

    I instructed Loretta, our trusty navigational system, to direct us to the Spokane Airport so we could pickup Tom. She freaked out and told us to make a left turn across four lanes of traffic. Not to mention taking all sorts of routes that no longer existed and then had the nerve to continuously tell me I was going the wrong way. It seems the last time Loretta was programmed for the Spokane Airport she was in a Model-T going to meet Lindbergh on his way back from Europe. Henry and I shut her up and located Tom the old fashioned way, on our own.

    In my fantasies, Tom got in the car and gallantly drove the rest of the way to Montana. Reality is a different thing altogether. I hadn’t factored in Henry’s need to be with Tom. I mean physically touching, snuggling, hugging Tom. He needed Daddy in a big bad way so I drove.

 
 And drove and drove and drove all the way to flippin' Bozeman.

    We arrived to a hotel full of drunken cowboy hats; there was a rodeo in town. We hunted for a parking space amongst a sea of very large trucks and scattered beer cartons. It was late, made even later by the forgotten time change we’d gone through. Henry’s shoulder was still bothering him from his wrestling injury so he soaked in some Epsom salts for a while. Then we tossed him in bed, as he desperately needed his rest.

(Henry and Luther get to sleep quickly- no he's not naked)

Tom and I sat quietly in the dark sipping wine while Henry fell asleep. Boots were jingle jangle jingling down the halls all hours of the night, but at 4:00AM it was Henry who woke me up as he told me his stomach was growling. He thought he was hungry. Like most mothers with one eye open I told his father to go out into the snowy night and get the remainder of the stuffed crust pizza they’d had for dinner. At the same time I told Henry to try and go to the restroom. Seconds later there was vomit all over the bathroom.

    “Forget the pizza honey.” I said over the heaving and splattering as I got up. I put Henry in the shower and cleaned up the wretched mess using the complimentary moist facial toilettes on the tile to mask the unpleasant stench.

    “Do you think he’ll even compete?” I asked Tom wondering exactly why he was still tucked under the covers and I was damp from emesis.

    “I think he’ll compete if at all possible. It is Regionals, his last performance at Level 6.” Tom stated. “He’s gotten tough. I don’t think you notice it, because you’re with him everyday.”

(Tom and Henry ready to go)

(Montana is just as close to Canada, but no yet no Maple Leaf)

    Tom was right. He knew his boy. Henry had no doubts about competing. He took some Advil™ for his shoulder and went out on the floor. I could see him wince in pain all during warm-up, unfortunately the torturous rings was his first event but he kept on. When he saluted the judge, he smiled and toughed it out without a trace pain. His scores were average. Yet, somehow he managed his personal best on the pommel. Go figure.

(My childhood friend Betty and her daughter Sutton live in Bozeman and came to support Henry through it all)

    In the end, we were proud of the newfound effort we saw from our little boy. The boy, who used to limp if he stepped on a prickly leaf, competed weak from illness without complaining. Somewhere along the way he’d turned into an athlete without us noticing.

(Tom, walking Luther after the meet)

    The way home was “Gone With The Wind”, the alphabet game, “Baby Mama” and “Hoodwinked”. Determined to get back and at least spend one day at home together

(Henry and Luther relax)

Tom and I split the 12 hours of driving – three for Tom, six for me with Tom pulling the 3 hour anchor leg of exhaustion. As we pulled into the driveway we all glanced at the barn wanting to go visit the new babies, but Vivian, Bruno, Irish and Deli were clamoring for us to come inside. So we decided to wait for morning.

April 3rd Cover Girl

(One of Spokane's historic homes)

    Lisa Dunn is one of my many Lisas. One of the uber-organized Lisas –a subcategory of Lisas, which would include L. Awesomez, but not my sister. Anyway this Lisa, Lisa Dunn, was a beauty pageant Lisa, is the mother of darling twins and was to be our tour guide and hostess during our stay in Spokane.

    When Henry and I arrived in the outskirts of the city, I pulled off the highway found a Starbucks, ordered a triple shot soy latte and went to the ladies room to don my makeup. I was to meet Dunn and a couple of her friends, Krista and Andrea and their kids at the museum for a special event. It sounded like a lot of fun, but I hadn’t had time to color my hair before I left and was a little self-conscious. My phone rang as I glanced at the number I could see it was my sister.
(From the World's Fair)

    “I just wanted to make sure you got through the pass safely. I’ve been checking the internet pictures to make sure I didn’t see your car stuck up in the snow.” She said. I was so glad she worried about me. Sometimes.

    “I’m here. I’m putting on makeup before I meet Dunn and her friends. I just wish I’d had time to color my hair.” I said annoyed at myself my vanity taking over.

    “Well, get out your pink tube of mascara and do the old in-between-thing.”  She suggested.

    “Good idea. I guess I’m so tired I didn’t even think of that.” I hung-up to carefully apply mascara to my grey roots while I chugged my caffeine.

    On our way to the museum, Henry remarked, “I like Spokane way better than Ellensburg, but I’ll take the rain if having the sun means you don’t get all the trees. It’s so desolate in parts it looks like Los Angeles where there aren’t any sprinklers.” Spokane overall is hilly with some interesting left over structures from the World’s Fair, but there are also a lot of dilapidated homes and areas that look as if no one cares. The museum on the other hand is surrounded by stunning historic homes and is quite lovely.

  (Spokane Museum)

(A tent like we'd like to use for Fort Flashback)

    As Henry and I walked in, a woman and her mother stopped us on the sidewalk and gave us their museum passes. They said we’d save $12.00 and thought we’d enjoy the exhibit.

    Upon entering, Henry immediately told Dunn our good fortune “It’s like when our family went to Disneyland we gave away tickets to some families.”

    “Pay it forward.” Dunn said with a smile. “That’s great, I’ll return the tickets I bought you.” It seems the universe and all my Lisas are taking care of me.
 
(Henry on the Washington Hand Press)
  

 

(Some paintings Henry was drawn to)
 

 
 
(German dancers)

(Henry truly enjoyed the twirling Scottish dancers)

    The museum was fun, the kids enjoyed the different exhibits and I got to spend time with some of Dunn’s friends and learned none of them were actually from Spokane, but rather California and Utah. They told me the good, the bad and the ugly of their lives in Spokane. We laughed and watched the kids run around enjoyed the bagpipe demonstration and cheered Henry on as he entered a history contest to see if he could “Outwit the historical figures.” He did and won a treat.

 

(The Campbell House)
(Dunn in Campbell House)

(Here I am in this lovely historic place and  all I could of think of was how do you scrape the wall paper off the ceiling)

(The kids taking a break)

    Exhausted from the drive we went back to Dunn’s where she proceeded to prepare a lot of food while I watched contently.  I didn’t even ask what the point value was. I just put an unhappy face down in my Weight Watcher™ counter book. Again. The kids went off to play while Luther and their dog Rocky got reacquainted.

(Luther looking over Lisa's driveway- he came with his own suitcase full of his coat, dish, food, leash, toys etc. I think he had more than I did)

(Luther and his buddy Rocky)

(Zach)

    The evening was wonderful full of jalapeno barbecue sauce and  strawberry margaritas made from the strawberries in their garden. It was really my first opportunity to get to know her husband, Steve. He was nothing like I expected. I don’t know what I expected really, but he surprised me. I always liked Dunn’s boyfriends in college, but Steve was different. A regular guy, a guy I could see on the farm having a beer with Tom. I liked him a lot. We chatted over hot spinach dip as he continued to make drinks. Henry was so taken by what was served he got down on his hands and knees and bowed to Steve and his barbecue prowess while the twins, Zach and Emily, giggled.

    Later upon Zach's request we played Apples to Apples™ and watched and a play full of death and decit. I’m afraid I faded far earlier than I would have liked. I don’t know if it was the driving or the tequila or if I just relaxed knowing I didn’t have any chores to do but I soon had to excuse myself from the festivities to take a little rest on the sofa which turned into the end of the line for me.

(Lisa in character)

(Emily)

(Zach and Lisa)

 

(The Cast of the play - Emily, Henry, Lisa and Zach)

    My only regret falling asleep was my missed opportunity. It was the only time we didn’t have all the kids around so we could have really talked. The kind of talking you want to do with a friend you’ve known 28 years. The type of talking where you tell each other the stuff you just can’t say on the phone because you need to see each other’s understanding hold each other’s hand and have another glass of wine as you discuss your insecurities and other honesties you just can’t tell everyone for fear they might not understand or throw it back at you at some later time.

    The next day, I woke to laughing children playing the Wii™ and fresh snow on the ground. I made coffee and waited for Sleeping Beauty to awake. Once she was up we were out with the dogs for a walk. Naturally, our hostess-with-the-mostess had another outing planned. “I would be remiss if I didn’t take you to lunch and show you the Spokane Falls.” As I was about to object, she proclaimed, “Your our guest, Denise so please hush.” Henry reluctant to get off the all consuming Wii™ had been skeptical about another event, but even he thought the falls were “pretty cool”. Emily and Zach wanted to go on the purple gondolas but it was hailing and we didn’t have time. I’d been cold for days probably from sheer exhaustion so Dunn called ahead and reserved a table by the fireplace for our lunch. A more thoughtful friend doesn’t exist.

  (Dunn chatting)

(The Spokane Falls)

(Lisa, Emily, Zach and Henry)

(Emily, Lisa and me)

 (The picture Henry took of me and Dunn - note uncovered grey on right)

    I excused myself after lunch and went to the ladies room to reapply mascara to my roots before picking up Tom at the Spokane airport. Next stop, Bozeman.

(some "footprints" Henry saw leading the way out of lunch place  in the cement- thinking of Clara)

April 2nd While We Were Out

(Clara and her first)

    Henry and I drove out of the driveway at 5:00AM headed toward our first stop Spokane, Washington. We were both anxious about Clara, Lloyd and their eggs. I had done as Toby had instructed and held the eggs up to my ear. I didn’t hear peeping as she said I might, but I did hear little clicking sounds. Given that the noise was faint I thought they might wait until we got back on Sunday with Tom.

    No such luck. Alexis let me know late that evening as I sat in Spokane sipping a margarita and eating spicy barbecue that Clara’s eggs were hatching. He’d gone into the Honeymoon Suite and heard a bit of peeping only to see Clara and her newborns.

    Missed it by that much.

(Clara and her first baby)

(Clara and her new baby play peek-a-boo)
) (more family show up)

(A tired mommy and her hatch)

(Proud Mama Clara)

(Hiding under the wing)

(tucked under safe and warm)

 

 

 

 

April 1st "Armed" & Dangerous

 (The four ring circus at Bellingham High)

    As I have mentioned before, I’m not a big wrestling fan. I’m trying. My girlfriend, Stacy, says it’ll grow on me. Her son, Nathan, loves it and her husband, Tommy, is some sort of aficionado. Still I haven’t warmed to it. The gym stinks, it’s humid, the sweaty boys reek especially when they’re changing into their wrestling shoes. I am however a Henry fan, so I wouldn’t miss it for the world.

    Tonight was the big tournament held at Bellingham High School. Six schools competed: Fairhaven, Kulshan, Shuksan, Horizon, Vista and Whatcom. When we arrived I was stunned at the sheer number of kids. There were four huge mats, electronic scoring systems and as many limber referees. There were programs with pre-arranged brackets based on previous performance. Henry was a little bummed it was just boring old me watching. He’d wanted Uncle Chris to be here, but as it was it didn’t look like it was going to work out.

    I’d thought the meet was going to be from 5:00PM – 7:00PM. I soon found out It was actually not supposed to end until 9:30PM at the earliest. I was in wrestling hell. To console myself and accept my fate I started chatting in the stands with some ladies. Jenny asked me which child was mine. “Henry, the one with the orange socks.” I said.

    “Henry Miller?” The other woman asked. I wondered how she knew him.

    “You mean the one on the ground with all the coaches around him?” My new friend asked.

  

    "What?” I said turning to look at the mat just as a kid came over and told us they were worried his collarbone might be cracked. Thoughts of hospitals, x-rays and the end of gymnastics regionals raced through my head. How was I going to get Tom in Spokane? I joined Henry and the coach on the mat. Several tests and an ice pack later Henry announced despite one very sore arm, he was good to go. Relief swept through me.

    Henry’s match was twelfth. And as it happened the woman who asked if he was Henry Miller, asked because her son was his first opponent. If Henry won he went on. He won. It was close for a while and then suddenly it was over and Henry was the victor. I scoured the program trying to decipher the madness and about had a breakdown when I saw Henry was in the 88th match if he was to take it all. I was consoled only by the idea that some unknown parent would be there for the 146th match as I was on my way home. I now had hours of waiting before he went again. As it happened, the nice women I’d met did not particularly like wrestling either.

    The Calvary showed up just in the nick of time. Lisa, Quinn and Chris filed in happy and peppy and bursting with energy. I felt like a wilted hot house flower. They’d been there less than ten minutes when they called Henry to take the floor.

 

    “Cro-Cro! Phoeeeb! Lisa!” Henry said as he threw me his glasses running to the circle.
Moments later Henry took the mat and my sister started yelling like my grandmother, Madelyn, used to cheer Roller Derby.

    “Get ‘em Henry!” She screamed jumping up turning around to make sure she wasn’t blocking anyone’s view. She hadn’t completely lost her mind. Winning this would make him City Champ in his weight division. He won by decisively pinning the kid with his good arm. Henry beamed while Chris posted his status on facebook.

    “Coach says they’re going to announce it in the morning at school over the intercom,” he said his eyes shining,